Pushing Daisies!! I Will Threaten You Until You Watch It!

Those of us in Canada are lucky enough to get Pushing Daisies on Tuesday nights, while in the U.S. it airs on Wednesday nights.
That means... the premier was TONIGHT!
And, without spoiling anything... it was awesome!
Ned and Chuck make me so happy that I've been known to make outloud "oooh"s and "eee"s when they are cute together... aka the below image:I want a piemaker of my own.

SO, if you missed it tonight, or don't live in Canada, turn on ABC tomorrow night and watch it. And if you can't do that, get your butt over to http://www.abc.com and watch it online probably as of tomorrow.
DO IT! You won't regret it. Especially if you get last season first and catch up fully beforehand.
If you are not watching this show I will personally come and kick your butt. There it is.

All Grown Up?

In my new placement, a lot of my co-workers are in their mid-twenties. They all seem to have their lives so put together. They have homes, significant others, some have children, and they have lives outside of work. They seem to know what they want out of their lives and more than that, they seem to know themselves.
And then there's me. I'm a few weeks away from 23. That means I am almost closer to 25 than to 20. I'm not that far apart in age from the people I am shadowing for school. So... when am I going to have everything magically put together and figured out? When do the boyfriend and the fabulous life outside of work come along? When do I figure out what I want in life and how to get it? When do I stop being awkward and shy and start being the self-knowing, confidant woman I should be?
Am I behind everyone else my age? Or do we all just grow up at different speeds? Or are some people just better at faking it than others?

Tres Belle!

(That is the extent of my grade-school Francais)

Everyone's favourite etsy-themed blog, Oh! How Lovely! is holding another contest! This week features jewellery from Picky Picky Designs.

My faves?
The Bee
The Octopussy
And, most of all…
The Acorn!

Wash Out This Tired Notion That The Best is Yet to Come

I guess it really is the end of summer. There were so many things I wanted to do this summer but never got the chance... I wanted to go to the beach with friends not clients, I wanted to go camping, I wanted to drink on some of Toronto's many fantastic patios, I wanted to go read outside in the park, I wanted to get a tan... Instead I spent it either at my school placement's camp, in class, at my parents' house, or driving in between. So much for a fantastic Toronto summer. I guess you can never really predict when you will be needed, and family and school have to come first. Next summer, though, next summer will be my first summer with a real grown-up job. That means money and days off, and meeting friends on patios after work for drinks. At least, in my fantasy job where I get paid highly and benefits for working normal hours, it will. Who am I kidding, I'm going to be a Child and Youth Worker... we don't exactly make the big bucks, work normal hours, or get any appreciation really.
It's been a weird Saturday. It feels like the first real day of fall. I woke up and it was gray and drizzly, and I think it's only gotten gray-er and drizzly-er as the day has gone by. One of those days where the thought of going outside is practically inconceivable, and the idea of snuggling in bed all day seems like a much better plan. I've had so much energy today, but there's little of my to-do list that I actually feel like accomplishing. So, it's resulted in me puttering around the house, not accomplishing much of anything and feeling incredibly restless. Waiting around to hear from friends to call with plans, watching things happen in the alleyway outside of my window, trying to do school work, re-wrote my to-do lists. There's nothing on tv, nothing I feel like reading, nothing really I feel like doing.
Days like this scare me a little. Days where I spend the entire day doing absolutely nothing. We're only given a certain number of days in our lives... how many have I wasted doing nothing? Wasted, that's really what I've done. Other people with days more numbered than mine could have used this day that I've wasted, and probably but it to much better use. But then again, we never know how many days we have... what if mine are almost up? What if I only have a few days left and I'm wasting the ones I have doing nothing? What if my days are almost gone and I've accomplished so little in my life? That scares me. I know I'm meant to do and experience so much more than I have. But that doesn't mean that I'll get to do and experience everything I'm meant to if I don't get a move on. I mean, I want to experience as much as I possibly can while I'm here, and I don't know how long I'm going to be here for... so I should probably stop spending my days holed up in my apartment doing nothing... right?

-The Inspiration-
Pig - Dave Matthews Band
Isn't it strange
How we move our lives for another day
Like skipping a beat
What if a great wave should
wash us all away
Just thinking out loud
Don't mean to dwell on this dying thing
But looking at blood
It's alive right now
Deep and sweet within
Pouring through our veins
Intoxicate moving wine to tears
Drinking it deep
Then an evening spent dancing
It's you and me
This love will open our world
From the dark side we can see a glow of something bright
There's much more than we see here
Don't burn the day away

Is this not enough
This blessed sip of life
Is it not enough
Staring down at the ground
Oh then complain and pray
more from above
Greedy little pig
Stop just watch your world trickle away
Oh it's your problem now
It'll all be dead and gone in
a few short years
Just love will open our eyes
Just love will put the hope in our minds
Much more than we could ever know
Don't burn the day away

Come sister
my brother
Shake up your bones shake up your feet
I'm saying open up
And let the rain come pouring in
Wash out this tired notion
That the best is yet to come
But while you're dancing on the ground
Don't think of when you're gone
Love! love!? what more is there?
We need the light of love in here
Don't beat your head
Dry your eyes
Let the love in there
There are bad times
But that's ok
Just look for love in it
Don't burn the day away

Look
Here are we
On this starry night staring into space
And I must say
I feel as small as dust
Lying down here
What point could there be troubling
Head down wondering what will
become of me
Why concern we cannot see
But no reason to abandon it
Time is short but that's all right
Maybe I'll go in the middle of the night
Take your hands from your eyes, my love
Everything must end some time
Don't burn the day away

Come sister
My brother
Shake up your bones shake up your feet
I'm saying open up
And let the rain come flooding in
Wash out this tired notion
That the best is yet to come
But while you're dancing on the ground
Don't think of when you're gone
Love! love!? what more is there?
We need the light of love in here
Don't beat your head
Dry your eyes
Let the love in there
There are bad times
But that's ok
Just look for love in it

Hoorah for Being Fiscally Irresponsible!!

Did I also mention that I bought something for myself from ebay this week? It was my very first for-myself ebay purchase!

I've wanted these beauties all summer long but vowed that I would not buy them full price. Thanks to ebay, I didn't pay full price. They're being shipped to me as I type. Eee! I can't wait!!
Note: This is why I am attempting to be a hermit and spend as little money as possible until my OSAP comes in. I highly doubt I will ever be able to teach my clients life skills around money management. Clearly I can't even handle it for myself.

Y'all Know I Love Handbags

Look!! Handbag Planet is giving away free handbags every hour for 24 hours! Go and enter! Do it!

I like this one.

The Short List

Okay, so my lofty TV goals have, as per usual, been trimmed. I generally start out meaning to watch many shows and drop a few due to lack of time, forgetting what day it's on, scheduling conflicts, or lack of interest.
Here is my revised list:

As always we have interesting characters and crazy-cool photo shoots on Top Model. If only Tyra would stop trying to act.... or speak... in fact, if Tyra would silently pose during the episode, I would come out of it without losing any sanity.

Lance Bass looks super cute, and I love that chef Rocco. And you never know what hilarious metaphor or simile will come out of Bruno's mouth next. Sometimes when Tom Burgeron is making jokes I wish he would silently pose like Tyra.


I thought I had missed it, but I caught the first episode when they replayed it later in the week. They have fantastic wardrobes and good music, not to mention a fantastic amount of bitchiness and snobbery. What's not to love? I think I need to catch up on last season.

The premier of Fringe was fantastic! However, working the evening shift meant I missed the second episode and then I forgot what day it was on and missed the third. I'm hoping to get caught up. Mostly because Joshua Jackson is a hottie.

I wasn't sure I would love this season of Heroes, but it's looking good so far! Not to mention the guys that make it worth watching.

Pushing Daisies hasn't started yet. I should start a countdown I am just so excited for it to start. Go buy the first season now, DO IT! Get caught up while you can!

I keep missing So You Think You Can Dance Canada, but I saw one of the first episodes. Hopefully I will find it again without a scheduling conflict!

Really, It's Not That Weird.

People do weird things all the time.
Some people dance bizarrely.
Some people wear '90s long floral dresses to the bar not in irony.
Some people don't bathe.
Some people shout at things that don't exist.
Some people like weird food combinations.
Some people sing the chorus of Brass Pocket by the Pretenders outloud while walking down the street.
Some people like wearing neon.
Some people hoard stuff.
Some people leave vases lying around with flowers and a pregnancy test in them.
Some people hang out in their garages all day.
I could go on.


So why, oh why, is it so deserving of staring when I take my cat out for a walk on a leash!? Really, it's not the most bizarre thing you will see in a day.

Hello, Fall!

At exactly 11:44am here in Toronto, it became fall. Unfortunately, there was no dramatic change - it didn't all of a sudden become jacket weather and all of the leaves didn't suddenly turn shades of brown, orange, yellow and red. But I can feel it in the air. Full-fledged fall is on its way. I am ready for beautiful leaves, the smell of the tobacco harvest, jackets and scarves to wear during the day and cool nights to snuggle over the covers.
Oh yeah, and there's fall TV. I'm currently watching the premier of Heroes. There was tonnes of hype for it this season and I wasn't really buying into it. It's usually around the 2nd or 3rd season that I have found myself losing interest in most TV shows. However, they're doing pretty darn well thus far. Can we please discuss the men I'm crushing on?

Peter, I've been crushing on you since the beginning. However, I'm not loving future Peter and the scar across the face business. I think we need to take a break.

Mohinder, first season I wasn't that into you, last season I got a giant crush on you. This season I'm on the fence so far. This whole Incredible Hulk thing is a little much, don't you think?

Syler. Umm hello! How did I miss you the first two seasons? I was so busy being scared crapless of you that I completely missed how extremely crushworthy you are! You're my new favourite Hero!

Man oh man, I love fall.

I'm Losing It Tomorrow...

My Craigslist virginity, that is.

Tomorrow I am meeting up with the seller (don't worry, in a public place) to buy a bag and a wristlet comined for $50.

I am pretty pumped! Anyone who knows me could tell you of my small (ahem, very large) Matt & Nat obsession. Sssshhhh! We're not going to tell Mom about this.

Vomit.

I keep smelling vomit in my apartment tonight.
It comes in wafts and is rather pungent.
I know I have not vomited.
After a thorough search, I have come to the conclusion that it was not the cat either.
Is it possible that it's coming from outside?
But, I am on the second floor.
And my windows face a sketchy alley.
Was someone vomiting out in the alley so much that the smell could waft up two stories?
Gross.
I almost hope it was the cat.

My Response to Change

Have you ever changed?
My original thoughts went something along the lines of: No! Are you kidding me?! When someone "changes" that's a bad thing right? "Oh, she and I aren't really speaking anymore, she's changed, we don't really have anything in common anymore." I'm Erin. I always have been me and I always will be me. I'm the same girl with the same loves, hopes, and fears.

Have you ever stopped changing?
Wait a minute. That is a very good point. 10 years ago, or even 5 years ago, if you were to tell me I'd move to Toronto by myself to go to school without knowing anybody in a field I only learned about a few weeks before I started in it, working with the most difficult kids there are, I would have laughed in your face. At the same time as I've always remained me, my definition of "me" has been constantly changing. I am ever evolving and growing with each new experience.


Maybe what's never changed is the fact that I am constantly changing?

Food for Thought - Courtesy of my Professor

Have you ever changed?










Have you ever stopped changing?






I will expand on this later.

Hope & Love

HOPE is the thing with feathers
That perches in the soul,
And sings the tune without the words,
And never stops at all,
And sweetest in the gale is heard;	5
And sore must be the storm
That could abash the little bird
That kept so many warm.
I ’ve heard it in the chillest land,
And on the strangest sea;	10
Yet, never, in extremity,
It asked a crumb of me.

-Emily Dickinson

Hope is what has gotten me through this year so far. Hope that things will get better, hope that everything will be alright, hope that I can get through this. Hope remained as my security blanket while the world around me was falling apart. And things have worked out... I kept hope and hope delivered. Is that how it goes? Hope, luck, God... I'm not really sure what. I used to know, it was nice when I was certain. That doesn't explain why bad things happen to people. I wish I knew for sure. For now, I'll keep hoping.

By the way, the other students and I met with the chaplain at the agency I am doing placement at, and she had us tell her a bit about ourselves, and we did. Afterwards, she was kind of summing up things and said something about each of us. One student felt the need to slow life down, the other wanted power, and for me she stated that I was longing for love. At first, in my head, I was all up in arms. Longing for love? What does she know? I am not! But, then, I admitted to myself that she was actually right. It's weird how some people can just read you. Am I that transparent?

"I Can't Believe That We Would Lie in Our Graves"

Medical researchers are doing a study into near death experiences.
Death scares me to begin with, so, although the idea that people could still be conscious after their body is dead is comforting in that it alludes to the possibility of life after death, it also freaks me right out that you could still be conscious after you are dead. I know, I know, I sit on the fence about a lot of things I read. Apparently I have trouble deciding which side I am on. Either way, really cool study, but also kind of frightening with what the results could mean.
P to the S - title is from a Dave Matthews Band song of that name.

Things That I Miss...

...From Home When I Am In Toronto:
1. Fields
2. Cicadas/crickets
3. Stars
4. Knowing people in town
5. Being close to Kenesserie
6. Food cooked by Mom
7. Gravel roads
8. Dad's corny jokes
9. Having a yard
10. Being taken care of

...From Toronto When I Am At Home:
1. Friends
2. Transit
3. The park near my apartment
4. Being able to go out and not see anyone I know
5. Feeling self-reliant
6. Shopping
7. My own apartment
8. Chillin' with TK indoors
9. The option to walk around inside without pants on
10. Constant amazement at where I am and at the people around me

Oh! How Lovely Contest!!

The Shops Blog at Oh! How Lovely has a new giveaway this week from Elephannie's Etsy Shop and I absolutely adore these!! If anyone wants to give me a gift for being awesome, this is my short list:
http://www.etsy.com/view_listing.php?listing_id=15241039
http://www.etsy.com/view_listing.php?listing_id=15217732
http://www.etsy.com/view_listing.php?listing_id=15172910
http://www.etsy.com/view_listing.php?listing_id=15156339
http://www.etsy.com/view_listing.php?listing_id=15092132
http://www.etsy.com/view_listing.php?listing_id=14043922

Now What?

What happens when you've spent months preparing for one event, and then, just like that, everything is over? It seems as though I've spent the last 6 months with one thought as a constant in the back of my head - mom, cancer, chemo/radiation, surgery. After this past incredibly long week, the surgery is over and Mom is doing well. She'll have to do more chemo, but that seems so minor compared to what we've been through now, and it's only preventative. So, the worst is over. Now what? Time to move on, I guess. Start really living instead of just going through the motions with thoughts elsewhere. Time to focus on me and what I need. It feels weird.

Now I Smell Good, Too!

Every few years, I save up my Shopper's Drug Mart Optimum Card points and redeem them to get a new perfume. It was time.
So I did research, going into the store to smell them, doing online quizzes, spraying them on me and wearing them for the day, and I fell in love - with Burberry Brit. After some confusion, I discovered it was on sale in the store for $20 - awesome deal. So I bought it right away, no point redeeming here. It smells so good!! And I was super excited about getting a deal!

It opens with fresh notes of green lemon, frosted pear and white almond. The heart blooms with white peony. The drydown is very gourmand with vanilla, amber, mahogany and balsamic Tonka bean accords. (http://www.fragrantica.com/perfume/Burberry/Burberry-Brit-819.html)

I was still determined, however, to get a perfume with my points. Once I decide to do something, I go through with it. So I did more research, this time, telling the woman working in the beauty department at Shoppers that I liked perfumes with woody smells - that's what the online quizzes told me at least - but I did not tell her that. So she had me smell a few fragrances, and then pulled out Deseo by JLo. I was hesitant. I generally shy away from celebrity scents. The thought of saying "I'm wearing Paris today" makes me gag a little. But Deseo... it was beautiful! Everything I was looking for in scent #2! So I went for it, and turned in my points for it and a few other beauty items (because Deseo was on sale too!!!) - $75 worth, free!

The top notes bring the accords of bamboo leaf waving on the Italian breeze, Sicilian bergamot, yuzu, and charming, intensely flowery freesia notes. The heart beats with notes of star jasmine, pink gardenia, orange blossom and French mimosa. The base brings notes of musk, sandalwood, amber, oakmoss, Atlas cedar and patchouli. (http://www.fragrantica.com/perfume/Jennifer-Lopez/Deseo-1719.html)

Usually, I'm not super girly. I don't wear much make-up on a daily basis... in fact, I am only learning now how to wear eye-liner. However, I have a sweet spot for anything sparkley, good sales, and now, apparently, for perfume. Hopefully that sweet spot is satiated for now.

Countdown

Ten movies you’d watch over and over:

1. Danny Deckchair
2. Zoolander
3. The Princess Bride
4. Amelie
5. The Rocky Horror Picture Show
6. Crocodile Dundee
7. Little Miss Sunshine
8. Peter Pan (not the Disney animated version but the live one that came out a few years ago)
   
9. The Emperor's New Groove
10. North by Northwest
    

Nine people you enjoy the company of:

(other than my immediate family)

1. Jim
2. Mel
3. Stacey
4. Sarah
5. Jessica
6. Sam
7. Lisa
8. Carly
9. Jen

Eight things you’re wearing:

1. Jeans (do I ever wear anything else?)
   
2. Blue T-shirt
3. Blue Tank top
4. Yellow bra
5. Black panties (ooooh sexy!)
   
6. Deseo fragrance by JLo (I am just excited enough aout my new perfumes that I might have to write a post about them)
   
7. Dark brown toenail polish
8. Brown belt
   

Seven things on your mind:

1. Figuring out placement schedule for next week
2. When can I meet up with the person I am buying my new Matt&Nat bags from (oh goodness, the obsession continues)
   
3. When I can go get my TB test (for school! I know I'm not infected)
   
4. The cat is outside, better check on him
5. I really do love this new perfume
6. Hope Mom's doing alright today
7. Both excited and not to get back to Toronto
   

Six objects you touch every day:

1. Computer
2. The cat (is he an object??)
3. Light switches
4. Some sort of Matt&Nat product
5. Cell phone
6. My dayplanner
   

Five things you do everyday:

1. Pet the cat
2. Check my e-mail/other internet sites
3. Take my meds
4. Drink Diet Coke
5. Sleeeeep as much as I can
   

Four bands or musical artists that you couldn’t live without:

1. DAVE MATTHEWS BAND
2. Counting Crows
3. Ben Folds
4. Jack Johnson
   

Three of your favorite songs of the moment:

1. You Might Die Trying - Dave Matthews Band
2. Mouthwash - Kate Nash
3. Homecoming - Kanye West ft. Chris Martin
   

Two people who have influenced your life the most:

1. Mom
2. Dad
   

One person who has been nice to you today:

1. Kristin

WTF Friday

I was listening to the radio news this afternoon, and two news items stood out to me enough to get a WTF.
To begin with. Kanye West. I love Kanye, I have his songs on my ipod, I know lyrics - it makes me feel edgy and urban and not iridescently white. (Go listen to "Homecoming" ft. Chris Martin... awesome!) Yesterday, Kanye was arrested for vandalism at LAX for attacking members of the paparazzi and smashing their camera equipment. Kanye!? WTF?? Here's the deal. I totally understand being pissed off at the paparazzi, I mean, I would be too if I had people constantly following me and taking my picture. But, getting into this business, you had to realize that there would be cameras everywhere, that's what fame is, right? And Kanye always struck me as someone intelligent, someone who would make smart-ass comments to the paparazzi rather than brutishly smashing their equipment. After all, the members of the paparazzi are just people trying to make a living and they are fulfilling a societal demand, right?
Secondly, there is a girl selling her virginity in order to pay for college. My WTF reaction goes two ways with the one. Firstly, WTF, isn't that prostitution? Secondly, WTF, why didn't I think of that? Kudos to her to being empowered by her sexuality and using it to her advantage. But at the same time, isn't it sad that this is what our society has come to? This girl has to turn her sexuality into a commodity in order to be able to afford a higher education. She is auctioning off an event that is supposed to be special, like someone auctioning off an old handbag that they don't want anymore. And there are people signing up for this!! Grown men really think it's okay to pay to take this girl's virginity so that she can go to school?? Sad. I can understand why, though, as someone who is about to graduate with over twenty thousand dollars of debt, it would be nice to have it all taken care of. Maybe this is a sign that our educational institutions and governments need to collaborate in order to make higher education less expensive and more accessible for average people.

Bee Girl

I have my Halloween costume!! Or at least a bought a few items at Dollarama today. It's going to be my take on the Bee Girl.




I'm so excited!! Halloween is my favourite holiday EVER. That's why I'm preparing a month and a half early.

The Mean Kitty and My Kitty

Sparta is my cat when he was a kitten.



Now he is a lot calmer... and a lot plumper. He is basically my favourite thing ever. We've lived together for a year now, we've had our ups - the very rare times he is cuddly, going for walks outside, having play dates with Sam and Dill Pickle - and our downs - the time he peed on my bed, the time he pooed on my back pack, all of the times he bites and scratches, the multiple glasses and dishes he has been responsible for breaking - but I love him, a lot. Who knew this wild beast of a kitten could make me so happy!?

I think I need to date more. I am caught in a downwards spiral towards the depths of crazy-cat-lady-dom.

Three Things

THREE THINGS THAT SCARE ME:
01 | Hospitals / Death / Sickness
02 | Change
03 | Other people (I could go on)

THREE PEOPLE WHO MAKE ME LAUGH:
01 | Sam
02 | Stacey
03 | Jess

THREE THINGS I LOVE:
01 | Thunderkitty
02 | Retail Therapy (Matt & Nat bags...)
03 | Dave Matthews Band

THREE THINGS I HATE:
01 | Feeling sick
02 | Being unemployed
03 | Not having a plan

THREE THINGS I DON'T UNDERSTAND:
01 | World policies (in regards to underdeveloped nations)
02 | Luck/chance
03 | Other people and the things they do

THREE THINGS ON MY DESK:
01 | My laptop
02 | A lucky elephant
03 | A mug full of writing tools

THREE THINGS I'M DOING RIGHT NOW:
01 | Watching tv
02 | Typing this
03 | Thinking about making a snack

THREE THINGS I WANT TO DO BEFORE I DIE:
01 | Ride in a hot air balloon
02 | Travel
03 | Fall in love

THREE THINGS I CAN DO:
01 | Sign Language (somewhat)
02 | Sell jewellery
03 | Light a campfire and cook dinner on it

THREE WAYS TO DESCRIBE MY PERSONALITY:
01 | Quirky
02 | Empathetic
03 | Caring

THREE THINGS I CAN'T DO:
01 | Sew
02 | Learn to play euchre
03 | Go underwater without plugging my nose

THREE THINGS I THINK YOU SHOULD LISTEN TO:
01 | Anything y the Dave Matthews Band
02 | Saturday Nights and Sunday Mornings - Counting Crows
03 | Made of Bricks - Kate Nash

THREE THINGS I DON'T THINK YOU SHOULD LISTEN TO EVER:
01 | Celine Dion, mostly "My Heart Will Go On" - and if anyone happens to come across a recording of myself and two friends singing it in our Grade 7 talent show, I would especially stay away from that.
02 | Air Supply. Seriously, were they EVER good?
03 | Nickleback

THREE OF MY ABSOLUTE FAVORITE FOODS:
01 | Tim Horton's Breakfast Sandwich with bacon
02 | Pizza Hut breadsticks and plain cheese pizza
03 | Mom's chicken noodle cassarole

THREE THINGS I'D LIKE TO LEARN:
01 | Sign Language - fluently
02 | To sew - with the machine
03 | Dance!! Something nicer looking than the fisherman/fish dance I am an expert at

THREE BEVERAGES I DRINK REGULARLY:
01 | Diet Coke, Diet Coke, Diet Coke (and sometimes Diet Pepsi)
02 | Orange Juice
03 | Crystal Lite lemonade

THREE SHOWS I WATCHED WHEN I WAS A KID:
01 | Captain Planet
02 | The Elephant Show (Sharron, Lois, and Bram)
03 | Arthur

The Big Bang

I'm on the fence about this The Big Bang Experiment.
Yes, it is super cool to attempt to recreate the conditions of the Big Bang. They hope "that new sub-atomic particles will emerge, revealing fundamental insights into the nature of the cosmos." That's cool and all, and probably really important to scientific development This is a huge project that has been in development since the 1980s, and has cost Five Billion Pounds.... which is more than twice as many dollars. That would be okay in my books if it were going towards curing cancer or AIDS or feeding hungry children or world education, but it's not. It's going towards a big long tunnel full of magnets and proton beams.
Do you think furthering scientific knowledge is worth such a large sum of money, or do you think we could have found a better use for the money?

My Fall Line Up

It's September... and that means Fall TV!! And from the looks of it, I'm going to be a busy girl. Here are my picks:

Dancing with the StarsI have been a loyal DWTS fan ever since the first season. I don't think I've ever missed one, and I feel guilty if I don't go online to vote. My former boy band obsession tells me that I'm going to root for Lance Bass, but usually I wait until the first few episodes are done before I pick faves.


Gossip GirlI started watching Gossip Girl last season, but stopped, mostly because there were too many other shows on. However, the hype from last season has shown me that maybe I should give it another chance. I do love well dressed bitches AND living vicariously through people with dramatic lives.


HeroesI've been watching Hiro and co. try to save the world since the first season. First season was amazing, second season was just good. Let's hope that the writer's strike time off left them with some amazing material for 3rd season.



Pushing DaisiesPUSHING DAISIES PUSHING DAISIES PUSHING DAISIES! It was by far the best show out last fall and I was so disappointed about the writers' strike because it meant no more Pushing Daisies for months. Amazing show. You need to be watching it.


FringeThere's a lot of hype about Fringe. Maybe because Joshua Jackson is in it? Anyway, I'll give it a shot I think.


America's Next Top ModelIt premiered last week... ANTM is my guilty pleasure. Tyra may be crazy... but it's just so entertaining. And the photoshoots are really cool.


So You Think You Can Dance CanadaI love So You Think You Can Dance, and I'm pretty pumped that it's coming to Canada. And the amount of Mary Murphy screaming will be significantly less than on the American counterpart, as she is only guest judging.


Survivor: GabonI've been watching Survivor on and off for a long time, so it can't hurt to check out this season.


My Name is EarlI've also been watching Earl on and off, and generally think it's pretty hilarious. Reminds me a bit of my hometown.


The OfficeI haven't been a loyal viewer of The Office in the past, but whenever I have watched it, I've just loved it.


30 RockSame goes for 30 Rock, loved it when I have watched it, but haven't watched it regularly. I think I'd like to start.


Don't Forget The LyricsOther than Jeopardy, DFTL is my favourite game show. I like to think I could go on there and kick some butt. In reality, the songs I could sing would be pretty limited.

Fake Flowers, Pills, and Rose-Coloured Glasses

It's over.
The surgery took 6 hours, plus another 2 in the recovery room. The doctor was really optimistic, even though he looked completely exhausted. They took out the section of bowel where the cancer was, and he did not see any spreading. They were able to rearrange her bowels so that everything will work properly again eventually. Also, they took out her gallbladder, apparently it was bad. Dad spent the day pacing around the hospital and trying to read in the waiting room. He was so anxious, and didn't want to go far from the hospital no matter how much Grandpa tried to get him to go for a walk. He loves Mom so much - I always knew it, but I never really realized it.
The O.R. waiting room was trying really hard to be homey. A tv on each side, non-florescent lighting, magazines, books and puzzles. It made me pretty miserable, as the tv I was watching was showing something along the lines of World's Most Extreme Accident, Disaster and Criminal Videos, and there were ugly fake flowers all around. I hate fake flowers. All I could think about the entire time was the mental image of Mom being cut open and worked on in the Operating Room, like something out of the way too many doctor tv shows I watch. Luckily, there are pills to help me with my anxiety, so no panic attacks or crying.
We took a break and went on a walk around campus to the Western book store. It was nice to be back at my alma matter. I see university times through rose-coloured glasses now.
Finally we got to see Mom. She looked surprisingly good. She was really doped up and tired and out of it, but she was able to talk to us and seemed in good spirits.
So the worst is over now, right? She'll recover from this, do another round of chemo, get the bowels all properly connected up, and then we're good to go. I can't wait for things to be back to normal.

Courage

Well, tomorrow is the big day. Mom and Dad have already left for London, they'll be staying in a hotel there for the night because they have to be at University Hospital for either 5 or 6am. Mom's surgery starts at 8am, and it'll probably take about 5 hours. Gross.
I am home for the week, as in my parents home, not my Toronto apartment. A week of skipping school and placement so that I can stay here with my little sister (so she doesn't have to go stay at the grandparents' house) and driving back and forth to London to visit Mom and let Dad have a rest maybe.
It's apparently a pretty intense surgery. Not looking forward to this. First of all, I have always very strongly disliked hospitals. They make me nervous... I only have bad hospital memories. They smell bad and are full of sick people. And they're so sterilized. Ugh. I get anxious just thinking about going. Secondly, the thought of seeing my Mom post-op is not something I like. She won't be awake, she'll be pale and sickly looking, and she'll be hooked up to machines. Usually I do my very best to avoid going to visit family and friends in the hospital, it makes me unnecessarily nervous, so I make up an excuse and don't go. I don't have that option this time. I need to be responsible and helpful and most of all strong. My family needs that from me.

"Courage is not the absence of fear, but the knowledge that something is more important than fear." - Ambrose Redmoon

Gimme Your Stuff

This looks really neat.

I'm not 100% sure what I would be interested in receiving, I guess art, accessories, jewellery, crafts, notebooks, candies, postcards, anything specific to your country, books, magazines, pretty much anything.

I could give in return anything Canadian - souvenirs, magazines, postcards, newspapers, candies/food, and I'm willing to consider anything else you have in mind! Oh! And sew-on patches. And anything from Italy, Spain, or Australia - I have two little sisters going there in early 2009 so it would be cool to get stuff they might find there for them before they go!

26 Things Around my Apartment

Here is my version of 26 Things, taken inside my apartment.