Friday, February 6, 2009

Dating With Erin: A Gloomy Update

Alright, so an update on the adventures of dating with Erin is long since due. Remember when I decided I needed to start dating, and when I actually signed up for Plenty of Fish? And then there was the sample of barf worthy messages I have received. Well, there has been a bit since then. Let's just say though, I'm starting to feel rather like this boy:

It's getting depressing by SmartMarmot

There have been two guys so far, the first we will call West Coast and the second we will call The Teacher.
West Coast messaged me first, he seemed nice and fairly normal. He moved here from BC and seemed pretty interested in me. I think I self-sabotaged that one. I was brutally honest about myself, and when I felt like he was moving to the meeting stage fasted than I was ready for, I told him I wanted to move more slowly. Shortly after that, things slowed to a stop. He stopped messaging me, and I didn't really try to re-start it, I just wasn't that interested.
The Teacher was next. He seemed really normal and things were going really well, we seemed to have a lot in common and the messaging was good. He seemed to be really interested in me, and then all of a sudden, he stopped messaging me. He had stopped for a bit before, over the Christmas holidays, so I thought he might return. I wait, and waited, and nothing.
When I first started this, I told myself that I was not going to be the initiator. I would put myself out there by being online, and they would come to me, right?
No more have come. It could be that I'm picky. Good grammar and an education is a must. I'm more attracted to certain types of people than others.

Plenty of fish by

I'll keep looking, but I'm not too excited about it.

And then, there was the slightly embarrassing real life incident. We'll call him Bus Boy.
The day before New Years Eve, I was riding the bus home from the subway around midnight, and saw a guy kind of looking at me. I was not attracted, so I continued to play Solitaire on my iPod (hey, it's an hour commute!). I happened to be getting off the bus at the same stop as him, there were a few people getting off, so I didn't think much of it. It was snowing and gross and I just wanted to get home and to bed because I was working at 8 the next morning. To get to my building, it is fastest to walk down this "Avenue" which is actually more like an alley. It is lined with sketchy garages, and can be a little scary at night. By the time I was at the end of the alley, close to my building, he started walking beside me, and struck up small talk about the weather. I was a little confused. Why is this guy talking to me? Is he flirting with me? Guys don't hit on me! He asked about my New Year's Eve plans, I told him I was working, he started asking questions about me and I answered politely, but did not flirt back, because I just wasn't interested. He told me he was 27 (5 years older than me) and lived in an apartment by himself in the building next to mine. He asked if I had a boyfriend, I told him I was seeing someone. Then he asked for my number. I froze. This sort of thing doesn't happen to me! Part of me figured that I can't complain about being single if I'm turning down giving guys my number, and how do you nicely turn down someone, especially at midnight in your parking lot? I thought about giving him a fake number, but was so flustered that I couldn't think up one, I was afraid I would end up giving him my parents' number or something accidentially. So I did it. I gave a random guy my phone number. That is so uncharacteristic of me, I couldn't believe I did it. We shook hands and I went inside, on my way in, he told me he thought I was hot, and, flattered, I said thank you.
Big mistake.
Less than an hour later, I recieved a picture text message, from him. The picture was of him half (?) naked and flexing. The friends who have seen it speculate that he may be pleasuring himself in it. With the picture, he asks to see one of me. My response was something along the lines of HOLYCRAPNOWAY! I ignored it. Not much later, he sends me another text message informing me that he would like to sexually pleasure me and inviting me over for a booty call.
Ladies, can I take a poll here: would this technique actually work on you???
I ignored that one too, and shared it with my friends of course. Over the course of the next few weeks, I continued to receive texts from him and voicemails, all of which I ignored, hoping he would get the point. One night, however, I accidentally picked up when he called. I pretended not to know who he was. He told me he was just going through his phone calling some people he hadn't talked to (and I am like, WTF, there's more than just me!?!). He asked what I was doing, I said I was hanging out with the guy I was seeing, and he still wanted me to call him sometime! He asked if I got text messages, I curtly said no. He said he was adding people to MSN and asked if I had it, I curtly said no. That was that. I immidiately saved his number as "Do Not Pick Up" in my phone, and got more calls/voicemails than ever before from him over the following week or so. It was starting to stress me out. I worried I would run into him, it's hard to ignore someone in person. It stressed my sister out even more, she wanted to give me her camping knife to carry around with me. I declined. Finally, one weekend, he called me Saturday night, Sunday morning, and Sunday night. That was it, I decided. If he called again, I would do something about it. That Tuesday, he called again. Right afterwards, I texted him. I told him that he needed to stop calling. I said I wasn't interested in booty calls or pictures texts, and that I had already said I was seeing someone, and I am not that kind of girl.
I haven't heard from him since.

And that is that, my friends. A Dating with Erin update. It's a sad state of affairs over here.


Jay said...

Sorry to hear of your weird luck. It's never supposed to be easy or else it wouldn't be such an issue for so many, right?

No matter. These experiences make for interesting blog entries.

lucklys said...

um, wow? what a creep. i wouldn't have been able to think up a phone number that fast and under the circumstances either, but i'm not sure i would have given him one at all. the story just made me feel slimy. that really sucks you had to go through that.

Angela said...

Thanks for adding me to your blog roll. :) I have returned the favor.

ria said...

that's discouraging, hopefully you will look back and laugh. it's sad there are such weird people out there

Marie said...

That last guy is a gross, perverted jerk! I hope you never, ever hear from him again.

Don't let those guys get you down though. There are just simply not the right match for you. (Especially that last one.)

EP said...

Umm, wow? Bus Boy's a little direct, and if I were you, I'd be running in the other direction just simply because stuff like that freaks me out. I cannot believe that!

Don't get down on yourself, though. The right guy hasn't come along just yet, and when he does, it will be amazing.

Classy in Philadelphia said...

That is so unbelievably creepy. Gross, gross, gross. I get flustered trying to give wrong phone numbers sometimes. I'm scared I'll give the wrong amount of numbers or something. Usually, I'll give the correct number up until the last digit.

Lace said...

Ew, what a creeper!! Glad he seems to be leaving you alone! Ergh, better luck next time :(

Gorilla Bananas said...

Why don't you just refuse to give them your number? Say 'No'. Send a clear message.

Lily said...

Oh, SKETCH! Seriously, that guy sounds like such a creeper! Good for you for flatly telling him NO finally. Guys need girls to be direct when it comes to stuff like that. Any more random calls or texts though and I'd have suggested you take your sister up on that camping knife offer... YIKES!

Little Miss Obsessive said...

Aw, creepers! Seriously though, this is like the story of my life... sadly lol.

Stacy said...

kind of a creep to say the least.

Ashley D said...

ewwwww why do guys have so be so creepy???

Andy said...

So, booty calls are a 'no.' Duly noted.
I used plenty of fish before, but had success with

I would now like to send me a check for my endorsement.

Larissa said...

holy crap- that text guy- yikes. I had to laugh cuz i've had my own share of weird guys sending me "naked" pictures on the net thru online dating services- ugh. but, have hope! I've met two really nice guys- and now I am having a problem choosing between them...ugh I ask for a guy and get two...but cheer up! and dont forget- you have requirements, so stick to them! you deserve a great guy- do not settle for less than what you need/deserve!

Your Ill-fitting Overcoat said...

Oh my god!!! What a crazy story! I love how he said he was just scrolling through, calling people he hadn't talked to in awhile, though he'd just texted/called you like eight billion times. Maybe that approach actually works with some people?